With COVID-19 It's Time To Redefine Solo Sex

With COVID-19 It's Time To Redefine Solo Sex

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With the now-ubiquitous New York City Health Department guidelines on sex and coronavirus circulating the interwebs and all talk of orgies and group sex being subsequently taken off the table, what are pleasure-seekers to do with our free time? But really, good on the NYC Health Department for compiling this list of factors to watch out for regarding transmission of the virus. Even the most vanilla of activities such as kissing can be a mode of passing along COVID-19. I’ve seen the memes about the surge of babies that will be born from this pandemic (are we calling them coronials?), but where are the memes about the Popeye arm from all the masturbation? In fact, masturbation was mentioned as the top sex activity one can engage in safely. And before people come at me about masturbation not being “real sex,” you’re wrong. It literally has it in its name: solo sex. And it’s immune-boosting to boot, so win-win. Since we all have the time now, here are some fun ways to get off when you’re in isolation.

 


  1. Slow It Down

While there's something to be said about the novelty of quickies, we want to shift away from the fast-and-furious model to one of slow and steady. Slow down your sex play. Savor the moment and relish all the feelings and sensations you’re bringing about in your body. Many distractions and obligations have been removed, so why not treat masturbation as the main course?

 

  1. Hotline Bling

Don’t lament a partner who used to call you on your cell phone. Pick up that phone and exercise your aural sex muscles. This is when you stimulate a partner from afar with just your voice. This can be a less confronting option than full-on video chat (which is up next!), but it's just as sexy. Since you can’t see each other, you really have to paint a picture in your partner’s mind about what you’re doing to yourself. Don’t leave out the senses. How does your body feel? What do you taste like? Can you hear their moans? This is also great advice for sexting, which I’m sure will reach new heights this month!

 

  1. Video Chat

This is a step up from phone sex. Pull in that same energy from above and couple it with the bonus of being able to see your partner. Consider your surroundings. Although it's admirable that you support a local business by ordering take-out, we don’t want to see those cartons in the background. Soft, indirect light is flattering; overhead fluorescent is not. And if it feels weird in the beginning, that’s okay! You’re trying something new. Feel free to laugh, and roll with it.

 

  1. Steamy Erotica

This can get very steamy very quickly. You can find written narratives about practically anything on the internet. Literotica.com has thousands of stories, written and audio, for you to enjoy. Bonus points if you and your partner take turns reading erotica to each other. You can also download the Dipsea app, which offers tons of brief audio stories and guided intimacy sessions for a monthly subscription.

This advice applies all the time, pandemic or not: Wash your sex toys after each use!

  1. Pervertables

This is one of my favorite things to do! Most of us have been told to stay home except for essential purchases, such as gas for the car or a carton of eggs from the grocery store, but I don’t know if that applies to hitting up your local sex shop and grabbing a sex toy. This is where your creativity gets to shine! Look around your house and see which vanilla object you can use for sex. Maybe you’re into nipple stimulation? Find some clothespins from the laundry room, but be sure to test the pinch level first! Does your partner want to see you spanked? Grab that silicone spatula from the kitchen drawer. Always exercise caution and good judgment when implementing pervertables. The internet has lots of suggestions for you. And FYI, the candles on your mantel are not appropriate for wax play.

 

  1. Sex Toys

Sometimes only the real thing will do and you want to use a sex toy. As of now, COVID-19 has been found in the feces of infected people, but it's not clear if it's in semen or vaginal fluids. Keep that in mind as you explore sex toys by yourself or with a partner. Consider trying a new toy during this time too. Companies online are still shipping, so use your fingers to browse the interwebs for your next plaything. And this advice applies all the time, pandemic or not: Wash your sex toys after each use!

  1. Virtual Group Sex

If the “no group sex” recommendation is really bumming you out, consider moving your party to digital. From my understanding, you can FaceTime with up to 32 people! This may take some planning, but it could be a memorable and unique experience if you get the right group together.

 

  1. Mutual Masturbation

This activity can be confronting, even more so than penetrative sex, but it can also be very erotic. Oftentimes when we engage in solo sex the thought of someone watching us during our private time can be daunting. If you feel comfortable and safe, show your partner how you pleasure yourself. The heightened experience of being on display may spark some extra flames.

These circumstances won’t last forever. Try to find some good in the tough times you’re facing. Expanding your erotic abilities and offerings is a great way to brighten your mood and lift your spirits. I’ll close with a message that was often repeated during our middle school dances: Keep it face-to-face and leave some (six feet of) space. Be well!

These circumstances won’t last forever. Try to find some good in the tough times you’re facing. Expanding your erotic abilities and offerings is a great way to brighten your mood and lift your spirits. I’ll close with a message that was often repeated during our middle school dances: Keep it face-to-face and leave some (six feet of) space. Be well!